Gut Instinct

You know when you have a feeling about something and you don't want it to be true, but then you find out that it is, and you don't really know how to react at that moment, but you try your best to be positive, affirming, and encouraging.

Well yeah... today I encountered one of those moments. LOL! I know some of you guys have asked me why I'm being so cryptic with some of my posts and its cus I'm a lady and I blog, but will NOT reveal the inner most parts of my heart to just anyone... bahahahaha~. BUT I still wanted to vent.

*Sigh... LOL! One of those days yahnoo what I mean?!?!? ;p

Gut Instincts... sometimes they are wrong... not gonna lie... like I'll confront people and be totally OFF, but then sometimes... man they are so ON! I wonder how we have this 6th sense at times...

Anywho... that's all. Done with my random rambling and being all cryptic on yah... bahahhahaa... TOTALLY looking forward to going to Chicago this weekend and spending time with old friends. Perfect timing... (=

#ilovetraveling BUT eeepppp~ on the airplane ride alone O_o #genuinefear

The Vow

It's seriously similar to the story of us and Jesus and how we forget him and he fights for us to know him RIGHT?!?! We had a discussion about this movie in my bible study group ;p.

So many new relationships, engagements, weddings, and VDAY is around the corner. WOW~ I love LOVE. Bahahahahaha~

I can't wait to watch this movie... woot woot~ U watch too! ;p

Box of tissues, I think imma actually spend $ and get some popcorn ;p, and friends/bible study group most likely. YIPPEE? SAD? lol~~ hmm... company is good... but this is a date movie... LOL!

=====> click it, u know u want too ;p THE VOW TRAILER

#basedonatruestory <3

Recruit the way...

THE MARINES DO IT

"My son Jim joined the Marines when he was a young man. I was proud of him, but I also noticed the Marines didn't sweeten their sales pitch for Jim or anybody else. Hard work, long hours, tough duty, extreme situations, and more were what they offered. All of this to find "a few good men" who wanted to be part of a great team. 

      Of course, this is a very sound screening device for attracting the right kind of person--the individual eager to pay the necessary price to become a member of that kind of organization.

      Those who applied for membership, who wanted to be part of the team, were not looking for the easy way. There knew it would be tough going and accepted it, even welcomed it.

     Unintentionally, I had been doing something similar in my own recruiting. No sweet talk or big promises. Playing time, trophies, or title were never, ever mentioned. The one big promise I made to candidates was that if they came to UCLA and paid attention, they'd get a very good education. 

     Over the years I think my approach screened out many individuals who may have been ill-suited for my system. This saved everybody a lot of time. In its own way, my approach had some resemblance to that of the Marine Corps." - J. Wooden

I read this today and of course thought of you David. I only hear of bits and pieces of what it is to live as a Marine and to serve our country and I can only imagine (and would only like too, cus I wouldn't make it as a Marine =), all the sacrifice, dedication, and hard work you and your fellow Marines put into fighting for our rights and freedom. 

Thank You David Lee for fighting for us and I'm really proud of who God has made you to be and the man he is shaping you to become. He is our sovereign God. We aren't perfect, but its awesome to see you strive and try daily to live for our Father as his child first and as one of the few and the proud.

사랑한다... 제니누나.    화이팅!!! (=

The Good Samaritan

Today in Seattle we had about 7-14 inches of snow in various parts of the western part of Washington state. I woke up and looked outside to see my yard that was covered in my favorite color as snow continued to trickle down and the sun began to shine a bit around 7 this morning. I jumped out of bed to grab a bite of a cookie ;P, and began to think of how COLD it was outside and how the homeless people in Seattle are dealing with this weather.

I had the urge to text or email people that I knew in the church, but stopped feeling a bit foolish for some reason. So, I made my morning breakfast that I'm currently in love with... cereal, bananas, and TOASTED COCONUTS. I LOVE coconuts right now, so I eat it daily and with whatever tastes good with it ;P. Turned on the news and munched on my delish breakfast to hear that shelters in Seattle where opening up places for the homeless to stay warm and some have even refused to leave their locations, but the option was open for them. Phewww I thought, but in the back of my mind I still worried about those that I have talked too, especially one lady and her boyfriend that I've gotten to know over the past month. O_o

Then I decided to jump in my car for a ride and adventure (thats another story) and see what my new AWD car can do in this snow. I was driving and I passed a man who was wanting a ride. He was stumbling and my heart sank yet again. Should I stop? Should I go? I'm scared cus hes a man and I don't know him. Dude, if only I was a guy? If only I had a guy in my car with me. Thoughts began to rush through my mind as I passed the poor guy.

Then the Parable of the Good Samaritan came to mind:

On one occasion an expert in the law stood up to test Jesus. “Teacher,” he asked, “what must I do to inherit eternal life?” “What is written in the Law?” he replied. “How do you read it?” He answered, ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.”  “You have answered correctly,” Jesus replied. “Do this and you will live. But he wanted to justify himself, so he asked Jesus, “And who is my neighbor?”  In reply Jesus said: “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he was attacked by robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead. A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side.  But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him.  He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, brought him to an inn and took care of him. The next day he took out two denarii and gave them to the innkeeper. ‘Look after him,’ he said, ‘and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.’ “Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers? ”The expert in the law replied, “The one who had mercy on him.” Jesus told him, “Go and do likewise.” -Luke 10:25-37

Love God and love your neighbor is first commandment and the guy I passed was my neighbor. These days, after taking part in the the homeless outreach and watching the news I feel week and paralyzed at times as to how much God can use my life to really help these people who are in such need. I mean of course prayer and loving on them when I see them. But the necessities of daily life, I feel so weak. I decided to take the month of Jan. off of in doing this ministry because I feel so overwhelmed emotionally with the ministry and just my transition and personal "issues", but yeah... seeing this man today walking, needing, asking, and just driving by... I didn't know what else to do... One of the few times that I wished I was a DUDE. There is so much NEED OUT THERE! and many are dying daily who do NOT know Christ. It's like my heart is torn and divided at times. 

But yes, so after my "adventure" I arrived back to a home w/o POWER! A tree had fallen on the wires and caused a power outage, so no power and water. It only lasted about 1.5 hours, but I HATED it. I really dislike being cold more than being hungry, and yeah... How do the homeless out there survive in such harsh conditions being cold and hungry... man... God... what can we/I do as believers in a world with so much need... 

#HOWCANWELOVEOURNEIGHBOR

Stranger

I've always found it interesting and sad when I know someone well and then for whatever reason they are a complete stranger and I don't know anything about them. I mean sometimes I understand why people "can't" talk, but nevertheless it's still really sad to me.

Lately, I've been getting to know so many people and honestly, its nice, but I really miss friends that I already know. People that know me well where I don't have to go through the "lets get to know each other" stage, where I can trust them and vice versa and we already know each others quirks and whatnot. People may "perceive" me as out going... but when you really get to know me, you'll know that I enjoy quality over quantity for most things in life. This including "friends" =). And I don't open up very easily. So when I DO, I really really REALLY dislike broken relationships. Poopers! O_o Why can't we just all live in harmony... bahahaha~ jkjk, but yeah.

I'm thankful for the friends I know and keep in contact with. And wishing the best for those I don't talk to anymore and missing everyone in general.

#sometimesimemo (=

Happy 53rd Daddy! (=

My daddy is ONLY 53 yo. WOW~ He's so young, I've known him for 28 years (going on 29 soon)... Like Whoaa~

So I put 5 red candles and 3 blue ones on his birthday "cake"... and this is his response.

Daddy: Jennifer, how many candles are there?
Me: Duh... 53 daddy.
Daddy: No, really how many?
Me: Fine... 8, but let's be creative... lol~ just go with it... 53 will burn the house down.
Daddy: Oh, so you didn't put 8 on there on purpose?
Me: I did... cus you're 53, and I explained... blah blah, not thinking much of it.
Daddy: Oh... (pause)... i see.
Me: WHY?
Daddy: It was 8 years ago that my mom died on my birthday.  I thought that's why you put 8 on there. Did u remember?
Me: Dangit... I remember that grandma passed away on your birthday, but I didn't realize it had already been 8 years. O_o

As I look back... I'm like... oh yes yes... 8 years ago was the last birthday I spent with my father, cus I had always been away on his actually birthday after that. And I remember that day because I saw my father have tears in his eyes as he shared the news to me.

Two lessons I was reminded of today:
1. My dad is such an internal thinker, and he's not very emotional, but he does have thoughts that I am so unaware of at times. Sad ones too... I have never seen my daddy cry... so I forget sometimes that he has sorrow, hurts, and thoughts that he isn't always expressing.
2. Time flies by (I can't believe it's been 8 years since my grandma passed, and since I last spent my father's birthday with him)... I know time flies... but every time an event occurs, I am reminded again and again (like daily) that time goes quickly~

#makeeachdaycount
#lovethosearoundyou

Happy Birthday Daddy! I love you Lots! <3

CACOPHONY

The cacophony of music, media, and voices of people are so DISTRACTING sometimes, that it's hard for me to hear the voice of God in my life. Daily I am reminded to seek after the Lord and his still small voice that can so easily be drowned out if I allow it too.

#dailywechose

i miss isaiah AND ~

One of the cutest kids I KNOW! It's not just because I've seen him when he was first born with a huge head and arms and legs w/o elbows or knees showing. Or even because we traveled from MI to TX together. He is just a cutie because he has a cute face, but also because he has a gentle heart, a slur when he talks, and I just love hugging him!

 Who couldn't love this cheesy smile and only he can get away with it! (=

 And look at his drool! He seriously had to wear like 5-10  different bibs a day cus they would get soaked... bahahahaha~

Ehehehehe~ I love this little guy and I've been missing him mucho lately! But yes yes... along with missing him, I've been thinking about his parents. My old pastor and pastors wife and how blessed I was to have them in my life while living in Austin. I really miss having the spiritual parents who not only looked out for the welfare of me as a person, but for my spiritual health as well.

Don't get me wrong... I LOVE MY FAMILY. And my parents are great. But their view of Christianity and the way it's lived out is SOOOO different from my perspective in life and they definitely don't ask about my spiritual well being.

So~ I'm reminded of two things:
1. I really need to keep showing the love of Christ to my father, so hopefully, maybe one day he will become saved. He's a great man with a big heart and good morals... just not Christ. O_o
2. Meeting a man whos life is centered on Christ is so important, so that my future family and children will be blessed with parents who live and love the Lord with all their hearts, soul, mind, and strength. Or strive to at least... cus I'll be the first to admit, I'm definitely not the greatest at it. But I try (=.

#thankgoodnessforgrace